As the seasons change...

Everyone is going away to school it seems, which is totally awesome because some of my friends are on paths that 2 or 3 years ago would have never seemed possible. On Friday, I said 'goodbye' to Alina. She has grown sooo much since when I first met her. It has been a crazy long friendship full of hateful words, tears, hugs, and lots of laughter.

I remember the first time I met this girl. She was wearing some "dark" clothing to church one Sunday. And my jaw pretty much dropped. It seemed to me this girl had no respect for herself or for the fact that others weren't as dark and crazy as she seemed to be. You could tell there was something different about her. Not only did she has piercings in places other then ears. (Which I may never understand why girls get facial piercings.) But she wore a corset to church at like 14 years old. It was odd, so immediately I didn't like her. Then one day we were over at Becky's house, and we went and got Mexican food from El Compadres. Where I got to know this "rebel child". She wasn't half bad, but I could tell we had a ton in common, which is never a good thing.

Since then, we have had plenty of arguments over nothing, and sometimes over things that we have both chosen to never touch on. But there have been plenty of laughs. Many times over movies, hanging out with friends, random conversations, odd situations, and sometimes at the expense of each other.

There are many happy moments. Like hanging out laying in the grass at a volleyball tournement after a recieved phone call of babies on the way and her needing to wait to be picked up. Even in stressful situations laughter was found.

I have seen her grow from this rough hoodlum to a beautiful young woman with morals, and value. Someone who has respect for herself as well as others. Regardless of things shes done she has proven herself to be an amazing friend. Yes there have been arguments, and many tears of frustration, but she is my sister. A girl who has always been referred to as my mini-me. And as true as that may be there were many times when it wasn't. When I would do something and she would say I did the complete opposite of what she would've done. Or vice versa. She is a sister to me in many ways, and in the most important way, a child of god. Having to deal with each other through hard times has helped us both grow.

It seems that no matter what happens we have come back together and have put our pride aside and said sorry, sometimes out of frustration, and sometimes out of need. But always sincerly. I am gonna miss her so much. She has been a rock when I couldn't be. She was the shoulder to cry on when I thought I had everything figured out. She was a challenge to be better because I saw myself in her.

Thankfully she has turned out to be an amazing young woman. I hope she does Amazingly at BYU-IDo. Hopefully she doesn't marry Adam Danger..field, because my heart would break.. but if they do date or any of that junk I'll be a happy yet sad sad cookie. :)

Well time for sleep.

-Cambrizzle. (emilaaays nicknameforme.. not sure if i used it yet..)

ps. My locket arrived, and I am in looove with it.

You are old school baby.

I am sooo in love with my baby. My gorgeous Nikon. Soon I will be getting a new lense for her. She is so well behaved she deserves nothing but the best. So, today was eventful. (I told you I would post again soon.) I went to the mall, got some amazing smelling body mist. (PINK by victoria secret, the purple one and the light blue one.) They are kinda opposite smells, but I love them both. I got to spend time with Kelly. She is such a sweet girl, and I am quite glad she came, because I needed some time out of the house, in a nice Non-hot place. The Mall was crazy packed. Like super Crazy. But I saw some old friends that I hadn't seen in what seems like forever. Last time I saw them, they had just gotten married, and now they have a baby. It is crazy how things change so quickly.

So I really should get ready for church, I plan to go to the branch, but there is a good chance I won't. I should really start giving my ward a chance once again. But its sooooore hard to do. Everyone seems to have fallen into a stride, and mine is a totally crazy one, that no one seems to get. Oh well. So I really should be sedated at night, I am ADDICTED to ONLINE shopping. It's a horrible horrible habit. I just spent a good 100 dollars on an outfitt. But I did also get a pretty neat locket, which I am overjoyed for. But no more spending money for me. I have blazed through 300 some odd dollars WAY too quickly. I seriously need some form of an intervention. But thankfully, not many know of my habitt. Bwhaha.

I should get mad points for not buying from perpetualkid.com this week. Usually I am all about buying something new from them. This time its clothing, and well accessories. And earlier I spent money on getting some body spray. And lots of birthday presents for others. So, at least I'm not totally self-centered with my money. Though I should save some. Even if its just a little. Well, once again I am up at some crazy hour in the night. its 4:30 ish. I think there maybe in an issue with me, last sunday I got no sleep, this Sunday it appears that I am making this a habit. But it may also be the fact that my mom said as soon as I was done with the computer to bring it back into her room. And honestly, I don't want to get up to go do that. I just wanna pass out on my bed, and not deal with moving things, except for maybe the covers. Oh how trivial life can be. ;) In other news, there was a fire on my favorite road in Lakeside, which was sad beans. But hopefully it will get contained. Geeze. Okay time for bed, Yes this is short, but here.. look at my face. yes it is accompanied by Ashley C's face. But it was her birthday party that it was taken at. Geeze i love my swimsuit.

Pictures!!

Theses 3 gorgeous young ladies are Amazing. Jenessa (the far right) asked me to take some photos of her and her sisters. And I had such a fun time. It was hot out and we were on a time crunch, but they were a kick.

They live out in Chula, which is a good 30 minutes away from me, but we went to a near by park and took some amazing photos. They were more then willing to do anything, and had some pretty crazy expressions. I would love to shoot them again, once I refine my skill and get a new lense or 2.

The blonde (Jordyn) is the youngest and she was hiliarious with her face, and in general was plain gorgeous. Kaylee (the Redheaded one.) was crazy fun, and pretty much I am in LOVE with her hair. And then there is Jenessa (the dark brunette) She is Amaaazing. All 3 of them were super photogenic which is always a plus. Early on the comment was made that they were the girl version of the Jonas brothers. (At least in the fact of how they are dressed.)

They were extreme troopers. Playing in the water and many many jumping shots.

Not to mention, willing to deal with my unsureness of what would look good, and trying multiple directions so that there was no shadowing on their faces. It was beneficial for both of us. And I am happy to see the improvement in myself. And I am more then happy that they are happy with the final product. Next time I get with them its going to be when its kinda chilly out, because the heat was crazy. We started off down this little trail and it was super bright. Then we ended up in a little waterfountain for children. There were TONS of kids around, but thankfully they stayed out of the way, which really suprised me. Considering we were in the way of them playing in the big watery portions of the fountain.

Them in age order. Jenessa, Kaylee, Jordyn. GOooorgeous.

Well I may have another post in a few hours. I'm going to a friends party, and she wants me to take photos for her there. So there will be more :)

-Camsillia (Heather's nickname for me from girl scouts.)

Oh Sweet Insanity

Sweet, sweet insanity takes over it seems. Chelsea (since I expect you to read this sooner or later..) thinks I have gone insane, or at least that I am quite an angry person. Well in a way I kind of am, I do have lots to get angry about, but there is also plenty of things I am happy about, and really don't recognize as a happy thing. So today, err well this post, I am going to post some of the things that make me happy.

Starting now..

I Love taking photos, and am beyond blessed that I own a camera that works and provides me with the oppertunity to take pictures that really express how I see the world. I also extremely enjoy people who believe in me to make my photography take off. I am still very amature but I am learning, and am always open to take photos for whoever asks for them. Hopefully one day this will make me some money, but until then, I am content with just doing it for fun.

Also, I do enjoy being able to Skype with people who I care about. Like Andy here. He is in the Navy, and is currently stationed in Kuwaiit which is the equavalant to a sandbox. Its amazing how technology has brought the ability to be thousands of miles away and still be able to talk to each other which just a click of a button. HA and since I'm on the subject of Andy. He is an amazing guy, and one of the reasons I am completely fine with people joining the Navy. He has the cutest dog named Dakota. She is a doll, and while he is gone I miss her dearly, since she is at some friends house, until he gets back in November. Ha come to think of it, thats another thing I enjoy. I enjoy Homecomings. I Love having my friends return home. The leaving is wretched, but the return is the best. It's the best oppertunity to catch up, make new memories, and remember the crazy times that were had, which always gives hope for the future.

Next on my list of amazing things I enjoy...
I enjoy meeting new people! I enjoy meeting the people that one day may be a great part of my future. And that is always exciting. Every person you meet has the oppertunity to change you. And in a way, regardless of if you let it happen, they do change you. Friendships are formed, or not formed. You are uplifted or brought down. Sometimes you are humbled and other times people help you create you to be prideful and mean. I'd like to think that one day I will look back and see all the things that people have changed about me. The good, the bad, the hiliarious, and even the awful. I'm dying for that day. I can't wait until I am old and can tell my granchildren about So and So who I met one night while video chatting with an old friend who was away at school, and how So and So pushed me to do amazing things.

I enjoy music. I enjoy lyrics. I enjoy the feelings that come when listening to music. I enjoy the kind of music that makes your eyes swell up with tears, but also make you want to laugh because you are so touched by how sweet and perfect this song is for you when your in time of need.

I enjoy poetry, and literature and books. The words from today will affect the future generations of readers and scholars. When we digitize books and make it so that with a flick of a finger you can read a book my heart aches. Books with real pages, the leather binding, that is all magical and hopefully many generations will come to apperciate.

I enjoy sleeping in till odd hours, getting up and running around, staying up late at night and repeating.

I enjoy sweet oppertunities to watch people. I love the way people interact, and I most definetly love getting away with not being noticed. The sad thing is that when there is a camera about people notice. So capturing the sweet moments of a smile are pressured with a camera. It makes it impossible to show the difference in a smile to someone who doesn't know what to look for.

I adore facial expressions. Each face has the ability to do thousands of different things, and I would love to see every single one of them. Take Virginia, She has a GORGEOUS face. And she makes some super odd expressions. As you can

see she can get a little silly. But that is one of the main reasons I Loooove her.

Friendship, is one of the many things that will be in constant motion. One day you are friends, the next you aren't. Best friends are like siblings you chose. They also have the ability to be gone for years, and the day you are reunited (YEAHHH HOMECOMINGS :] ) it's as if there was never time spent apart.

Well, in conclusion, I am tired. Happy, content, amused, and Sleepy. So one last picture of your favorite humble person and then I am off to bed where my dreams are my reality, and I control the outcome.

Yep, another picture of me.. only I'm showing off my wish necklace (its a small star.)

GOODnight

-Cambrizzle (Emilaaay calls me that.)

People with crazy names = LOVE

I am completely in love with people with crazy names. I in no way have a normal name, and at times it is quite unique, but I met someone named Pendlten and his middle name is Carisle*, which is a totally twawesome name. I met another guy today who had a super bizzare name, but sadly I couldn't even prounounce it without butchering it completely.

Anywho, I am supposed to be taking a nap right now, but alas I am not. Yet, at least. Hopefully I can find the will to lay down and just let my body take control over my mind and its need to run a thousand miles a minute.

------

So I ended up passing out for a good 10 minutes, then ran outta the house like a mad person to go to this fireside at church. I enjoy firesides, especially when they serve pie after ( I AM A HUGE PIE FAN.) It was a sweet and short, just the way I like firesides. Firesides on unity are always a big hit, plus it is kinda fun to see how people react to the surrounding people after they are told that they need to be more friendly and warming towards visitors. Which is all good, but it is a trait that needs to be continued into regular use. Which is one of the reasons I Love HELIX YSA ward. We are really good at making sure everyone is welcomed, and said hello to. Which at times can be hard, introducing yourself to strangers can be kind of a daunty task considering that from the time we are little we are told that we shouldn't talk to strangers.

Anyway, its once again night time, and still no sleep. I am all dressed up for bed and no desire to sleep.

TC however is dying for me to put the computer to rest and join him in sweet blissful sleep. He is so demanding, and then when he is asleep he snores like a chainsaw. But he is my cat, and my best friend. The one guy in my life that will never leave me for another girl (he prefers men anyways... :] ) he is faithful and cuddly and next to never complains, unless I forget to feed him. Which I do quite often.

Well I am pretty sure Mr. Sandman is looking for my head to fall gracefully on the pillow and for my conciousness to be lulled into a false sense of reality that which is also known as my dreams.

Ha I have serious isseues this late at night. Goodnight world. Don't rape my sleep schedules ever again please :) tomorrow will be a day full of happiness, or FHE mmm sleep and FHE. I'm thinking I may never get off.. Okay here it goes.

-CamWill. (spencers nickname for me.. I kinda don't like it UNLESS he is the one saying it.)

Things change

This weekend has been filled with much happiness. It's almost crazy how many people were smiling, laughing, and even some tears of joy. Gotta love "Wedding Season". Today I went to my friend Noah's wedding to his gorgeous wife Rhawnie. Me and one of my favorite girls went and it was a gorgeous gorgeous wedding reception. It was simple and elegant, her dress was beyond pretty, and it fit her style perfectly.

Noah is a lucky man and she is a lucky woman. They are such a beautiful couple and I really do wish them all the happiness in the world, because they both deserve it. There arent many couples that I would really say are perfect for each other, but they are definetly among the few. This past few weeks have been nuts. I am actually going to help my friend shoot a wedding in September, which I am completely excited for, so some of my raw talent will be set to good use! Also, work has changed the hours so I now work Tues, Wed, Thurs. And have off the rest. But I work from 2-10pm which is killer.

So a bizarre trend the past few weeks has been people texting me and apologizing for things that I really don't really care about. Things that are in the past, that can't be changed. It's almost un-natural for me to hear they are sorry. Sorry for things that I contriubted to, and was a willing participant. But hey, I can't really do anything about that. Hopefully I can really let go, and give them what they want, even if it is something as small as letting them apologize.

Hmm, so beyond that... I am no longer twitterpaited, because he is now dating one of my really good friends. And I am beyond happy for her and no one is to blame or at fault, and theres no issue so thats always nice. I like that we can all be adults, though I do kind of feel like they are way to concerned with my feelings. In a situation of love, my feelings don't matter, and putting me in the middle makes me uneasy. But I am most definetly amused with the situation. Not only because God works in mysterious and amusing ways, but that they found each other and in this situation, something beautiful will hopefully come of it, because they both deserve it and need it. I'm young and naive at times, so I have plenty of time to figure out my wants and needs, and fix my flaws.

And boy do I have some mighty big flaws. I am emotionally detatched, I like to sleep in till noon, I can be overly patient and willing to please, others come first with me, I don't take the time to consider peoples feelings in alot of the things I do, and I am just insane at times. But at some point they might change, or get worst but I will find someone who is willing to put up with it, and thats all that matters.

Geeze love changes all. It is magical, and wonderful. Sometimes it gets in the way of plans but other times it enhances the senses and makes experiences worth some of the pain. So I think I have a new philosophy on life, "When in doubt, Dance it out." So no more of this self-pity and unhappiness, it's time to dance out my issues. Time to be happy and not let anything get me down.

So on my quest for happiness, I have found a great therapy, that just isn't that amazing on my bank acccount. It is buying goodies from Perpetualkid.com. They are kind of like a gag gift online store.

They sell Everything it seems. One year I bought someone a remote control that was shaped like a gun, and when you pulled the trigger the channel changed. It was awesome. Recently I have bought gum called "freaking unicorn gum" and a Slush Mug (which turns cold drinks to slushee in a matter of minutes without having to go to 7-11 or without a freezer, which is pretty awesome) Also, I have gotten a cassette shaped bag, a wish necklace, and a ninja toothbrush sanitizer. Like I said, ALOT of totally amazing, and awesome things. Oh and when you open the package there is a little finger monster (see above picture) who is eating biodegradable packing peanuts (which is fun to watch dissolve in water)

Such happiness from such frivolous things, But hey I am young aren't I?

Well, the night has gone, and the day has come again. Time to prepare myself, for another amazing day in the love of the only man in my life (THE LORD). Sunday, is the best day.

"Sunday is the golden clap that binds together the volume of the week"-Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Well I am headed to bed.. err well a powernap before church. goodnight :)